Fade Rift: Inbox

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You know what to do.

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[A soft sigh, and Nathaniel kisses him gently but firmly. Five years feels like a long time when Anders is this close, and the seconds are no faster than they were before.]

Your husband isn't as amazing as mine. Mine is turning heaven and earth to save me. And I will be at his side no matter what comes.

[justice_is_blond]

[Tears burn his eyes again at Nate's words before Anders takes a slow breath to fight them back. The now is good, and he's all right.]

You'd do the same for me. You stood for me with Hercules and the advisors, protecting me from the start. Even before I'd shown you how good I was at kissing. And bribed you with a puppy.

[There. He's already managing to sound a little better, at least.]

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[Gentle fingers cup Anders' jaw, lift his face to look at him. Nathaniel isn't crying, but Nathaniel seldom does. His eyes express sentiment nonetheless, as keenly as tears would have.]

I love you. There is nothing you can do to make me feel otherwise.

[justice_is_blond]

[He gazes back into Nate's eyes, drinking in the sight of his beautiful, emotion-filled face.]

I love you too. My heart is yours, for all of time.

After he tries to be a hero.

[justice_is_blond]

In the end, he didn't get Nate's coin back. Taking it from people, even people who didn't do the work, was cruel. Later he can talk to Nate about maybe not pre-paying, but for now, he's at least satisfied with what he'd accomplished with Alistair. It might show in the lightness of his step when he comes in to the room, or the way he greets Nate before he greets his cat - a kiss to the former, followed by a murmur and a treat for the latter.

"You'll never guess where I've just come from."

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Nathaniel is on the bed, having set aside a book and started just lounging with his hands tucked behind his head and contemplating the ceiling. He comes alive when Anders enters, and he sits up and scoots back against the pillows, hoping for a cuddle.

"Well, you haven't brought anything with you. I'll guess the Gallows."

[justice_is_blond]

He gladly accommodates, kicking off his boots and fitting himself against Nate.

"Initially the Gallows. That didn't... exactly go well. But then I went out to the Inquisition's boats. Or ships. I'm not quite certain what the difference is, but Isabela's not here to yell at me for calling it the wrong thing so I'm not concerned."

He's pleased with himself, which tends to lead to him being a bit more talkative.

"I've spoken with Alistair, and he may try to keep from insulting you except to your face. At least it sounds like he'll make an effort. Teren wasn't interested in discussing anything, so I couldn't help there. But we've a little progress."

At last he's been able to help Nate a little, protect him a little, after all Nate's protected him.

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Nathaniel goes quiet. If Anders looks at his face, he looks...perturbed. After a moment he sits up and squints at Anders.

"You talked to them for me? Because they didn't already hate me enough, now they think my husband has to fight my battles for me?"

[justice_is_blond]

"What?"

He blinks at Nate with no little confusion.

"Alistair doesn't hate you, I don't think, and I... I thought it would help. You were stressed and upset. What's wrong with one husband supporting the other?"

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"Support is what you did for me last night. You helped...you bolstered me, you had me feeling better about it, like I could handle this." Nathaniel is increasingly irritated. His gestures, his body language is agitated, and his voice is getting quieter. He looks away, he looks down into his lap, he looks at Anders only briefly, though frequently. "And I know, I do not doubt that you really had faith in me. So why was this meddling necessary?"

[justice_is_blond]

"Meddling. I go in to back you up and I'm meddling." He crosses his arms, shifting a little away from Nate. "You want a united front for the Warden leadership but not from us? You can stand up for me and protect me, but Maker forbid I try to do the same? Why is it different?"

This was supposed to be a combination, encouraging Nate and then helping with the other participants. He doesn't understand how it's gone wrong.

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Nathaniel pinches the bridge of his nose, folds in on himself, and falls silent. He doesn't know the answer to the question, only that he is bracing for this to make everything worse. That's how things work in the world. Maybe not in Anders' world, where people need a voice because they are silenced forcibly, but in the real world, this is how it works.

That thought makes him soften. Anders was trying to do for him what he does for everybody. Nathaniel can understand it when it's put that way.

He sighs and sits back again. "It's not. It's our worlds that are different, my dear. In yours, people aren't allowed to speak. In mine..."

He has to think of a way to put this. How things are, for non-mages and especially nobles.

"In my world, it's a free-for-all. The only way to have respect is to scramble and fight for it, and if someone else gets to it before you, you're out of luck. No--if someone else gets there before you, it means you weren't worthy of it in the first place.

"You know what my mother was like, or at least some of it. When I went to my father asking him to make her stop, he told me to tell her myself. To stand up for myself. And if I didn't, there was no help he could give me. I don't think I've told you that before because to you, it might make him seem callous. And he would win no trophies as a parent, but this was a kindness from him. He was teaching me a lesson about how to survive. How to fight for my honor because I could never expect anyone else to do it once I was on my own."

[justice_is_blond]

It's... entirely different from his experience. He'd had no voice in the Circle, had fled the Wardens when they betrayed him, hadn't been able to help enough mages because no one in power would listen, all his life he's needed intercession.

"You're not on your own, though. And Teren said you'd have to talk with her yourself, so maybe she follows that sort of thinking, but Alistair didn't. You have me alongside you, so why do things alone? I don't have to. You don't either. Your father was cold and wrong because he should have dealt with your mother being cruel to you. That's part of his job as a father, because she wasn't about to listen to you."

He huffs. "Your parents are assholes. That's the lesson to take from that, not that either you stand alone or you lose. And Maker forbid Rendon Howe sound callous." Anders uncrosses his arms and experimentally reaches out to rest his hand on Nate's. "This is our world. We're together in my battles, let's be together in yours."

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The comment about his father gets a sudden wracking, helpless gut laugh that tapers off into a chuckle, the smile from it not going away after. It does sound ridiculous now, trying to keep Rendon Howe from seeming callous after all his famous crimes. Instead of letting Anders take his hand, he turns and wraps his arms around him, carrying him to the bed, feeling night and day from the way he did a moment ago. Anders is right. This is their world, not only his.

"You really will be the reason I make it through this sane, my darling boy," he says, kissing Anders on the temple twice.

[justice_is_blond]

He loves when Nate laughs, but never more than in this moment. It's the sound of forgiveness and acceptance here, as well as amusement, and Anders cuddles close.

"That is the plan," he says, beaming at Nate. "Or part of it. Optimally we'll both make it through this more or less sane." More or less, because he's aware of the fact that he's not entirely mentally well. He can function, though, and he'd like to keep it that way.

"Maybe even with a second cat," he adds in jest before shifting in Nate's arms to loop his own around Nate's neck and return a light kiss. "I'll ask before, in the future, before interceding, if you'd like. I don't want you to feel like I might undercut you in someone's eyes."

Crystal

[wardeneructate]

You got a minute?

[He's, um, got a bit of a request.]

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"If you had asked, I would have said no," Nathaniel says softly, uncertain, thumb stroking one golden temple. "And there might have been no headway made at all. I can hardly condemn something that worked. And it came from your heart, which I love."

He flattens his hand against that heartbeat.

"You always speak for those who can't. Thank you."

[pinprick]

What's the matter, Oghren?

[wardeneructate]

So I don't want to go to the virgin again because he thought teasing me was a good time. Figured I'd go to you instead.

I...need some help. With writing. My spelling is terrible but I want the old girl and the nugget to know where I am.

[justice_is_blond]

Anders' smile is warm and sappy at Nate's words and touches.

"I love you. I couldn't do any less for you than I've done for strangers." One hand rests over Nate's, holding it there. He's alive thanks to Nate's help, but even more, he can enjoy life because he has Nate by his side.

"I'll take more care in the future, love, and I'll be there for you. We're together, and everyone who sees us will marvel at Howe together we are."

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A squint in one eye. "You know you're making fun of your own name when you do that now, yes?"

[justice_is_blond]

"You know I never meant the making fun as an insult so I've no problem with the pun, yes? I did always have interest in riding you, so being mean wasn't exactly on my list of things to do."

His expression is innocence itself. "Being irresistible and unforgettable were my priorities."

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"Mm." Nathaniel leans in for a slow kiss. "I thought you would be more excited than this about the reminder that you have my name. I know I'm excited." Another kiss. "I haven't rewarded your hard work yet. And you promised you would obey some of my orders today."

[justice_is_blond]

He shifts to be underneath Nate while returning the kiss, fingers going up to play with Nate's hair and undo it from its ties.

"I'm always excited by reminders of how I'm yours," he purrs. "Did you have orders to give me? I'd enjoy the opportunity to demonstrate how much I respect you."

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Nathaniel makes a little sound into Anders' mouth at the next kiss, thoughtful. "Then respectfully take off your clothes for me. And make a show of it."

He rises to his knees to give Anders room to stand up, quickly stripping off his own shirt as he does so.