Anders wraps around Nate as the he comes down before kissing the top of his head. For several moments he simply lets the moment last with them close and warm together. It's so much of what he's always wanted, love and affection and sex, and with someone he admires and adores absolutely. Why can't it be enough? Why can't he be happy with just this?
"I..." He trails off and closes his eyes. "I love you. Having this, having you, is the best thing to happen in my life." The words are quiet; if he said them any louder there might be guilt showing in his voice. Nate deserves better, and Anders can't simply stop striving to be the better, not yet. Maybe in time, though. He wants to do better, and if the Resolutionists start to change, there might be a future in which he doesn't have to worry constantly. ...About mage freedom, at least. They're Grey Wardens. They might not have that much time left.
Anders buries his face against the top of Nate's head, clinging instead of simply holding him.
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chiming
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Date: 2016-12-19 12:07 am (UTC)From:"I..." He trails off and closes his eyes. "I love you. Having this, having you, is the best thing to happen in my life." The words are quiet; if he said them any louder there might be guilt showing in his voice. Nate deserves better, and Anders can't simply stop striving to be the better, not yet. Maybe in time, though. He wants to do better, and if the Resolutionists start to change, there might be a future in which he doesn't have to worry constantly. ...About mage freedom, at least. They're Grey Wardens. They might not have that much time left.
Anders buries his face against the top of Nate's head, clinging instead of simply holding him.